Confessions of a Control Freak

I am a control freak, I fully admit it! I want to be the one driving the car, flying the plane, packing the bags, preparing the meals...you get the idea! I am the poster child for someone that only feels truly safe when she is in control. The irony of this all is that I am in control of very little in life. Initially this thought scared me....like immense fear kind of scare. Then I realized, I am incredibly blessed that I am in control of very little because my Heavenly Father is in control of EVERYTHING!!! What a wonderful reassurance! God has all the information. He sees the whole puzzle and He has promised that He knows the plan he has for us, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future". I can't tell you what is going to happen in the next five minutes, much less further down the road! You wouldn't go want to be in an airplane flown by a pilot that only knew a few of the controls would you? Especially to someone who is a control freak, it only makes sense to have all the information and all the pieces needed to guide. This is when I realized that I am not the one in control. I do not have all the information and the perspective of my Heavenly Father. Of course my goal is to become more like Him everyday but my job is to look to Him for the guidance needed and to thank Him for His control over my life!

 When things happen that are out of our control, it seems to throw our world into chaos! Those of us that give ourselves credit for the planning of our days and meeting demands successfully are left wondering what to do! And in the midst of not knowing what to do, sometimes we don't even know what to pray. The beautiful thing is that we serve a God that knows our hearts, even when we don't have the words. Praise the Lord, He fights for us and is with us now and forevermore!  That give courage to even the most anxious of hearts! May the Lord be with you!

Just Relax!

Friends, there are a few things that I can promise you I will not tell you. First of all, I will not tell you to "Just relax". I have heard this so many times since I have been dealing with anxiety! Those that don't understand are quick to give advice of "Just relax", "You need a vacation", "You are too high strung", and "You just need to carry on with your normal routine. This will get better". The problem with this is when you have anxiety, you don't choose to be upset or scared. It is like a wave that comes over you. Our loved ones giving us advice simply want us to feel better. I truly don't think that people intend to come across as insensitive. It is just hard to understand if you have never dealt with it! Yet another reason for the creation of this blog!

 God's word instructs us that we are to encourage one another. I will only tell you things in this blog that give me peace of mind in the times when anxiety is attempting to take hold of my joy. My desire is to encourage you and lift you in prayer. I will write of devotions, scriptures, and meditations that inspire me and give me the burst of encouragement I need. I will also share other blogs that I have found comforting. I would ask that you also share the things that you have found helpful. If you have prayer requests, please share those as well. We are a community of believers and we are called to pray for one another! May the Lord give you comfort and peace!

Why another blog about Anxiety????

Anxiety is a word that is highly overused. Many people often say "I am so anxious to go on my vacation", "I have anxiety about the test I have coming up", "I am anxious for my wedding day", "I am so anxious about all the things I have to do today". If you stop and think about the times you have used the term "anxiety", it may have had many varying connotations. I have always been quick to throw the term in a description of how I felt on a day that was overwhelming. It was not until one particular day that I would use the term "anxiety" in a totally new connotation...the day I experienced my first anxiety attack! I thought I was dying...no kidding! My heart started racing, I felt light-headed and nauseous, and I began sweating like crazy! I seriously though "Ok Lord, this is it. I am about to die!". Thankfully dying that day was not in His plan for me but I am learning that once you experience anxiety is not easy to get over! That is the reason for the creation of this blog. I know that I am not the only lady out there reading this battling with anxiety! It can be a difficult battle to fight and I have found that it is hard to describe to people what goes on...much less get them to understand. I have been told to "relax" and that I just need to go get a massage or something. Ladies, I am all about pampering but there are only so many massages you can get in a day! The best medicine I have found for my anxiety is the Word of God and talking to my sisters in Christ that battle this same giant! I have prayed during all of this that God would draw me close to my Godly sisters and that we would lean on His promise from Matthew 18:20 "For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them". I can testify that through my battle with anxiety, my Father has never left me nor forsaken me and it is because of His strength I face my fears daily! My desire if for this blog to serve as an outlet and a meeting place for us to gather together and know that no one is alone! We may not know one another and we will likely live many miles apart but as sisters in Christ we are never far apart and our prayers for one another will be heard by our might God!!! May God bless and keep us all through our journeys!